How to Make Changes with Alex Youdim

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Unknown Speaker 0:16
this is George G. And the time is right. welcome today’s guest strong and powerful. Alex, you Diem. Alex, are you ready to do this? Are you ready? All right, let’s go. Alex is an enterprise account manager. Surely before the pandemic, he got laid off from a job that he loved, he broke up with his girlfriend of five years and decided to take control of his life and make some really dramatic changes. Alex, I’m excited to have you on tell us a little bit your personal life? And let us know all about these changes.

Unknown Speaker 0:47
Yeah, thank you. I’m excited to be here.

Unknown Speaker 0:51
So yeah, a couple of years ago

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kind of doing what everyone was doing plugging away thinking I had everything set for life, right had all those boxes checked as as with a girl that

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I was in love with, we had all the plans we’ve, you know, been living with each other for a few years and dating for five and

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I thought we had a future kind of plan together. For about the same amount of time I was in this in a recruitment marketing position, doing marketing with enterprise brands, and social media marketing for employment.

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Super cool company,

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is really like the job that I thought I was, you know, wanting to build with and

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grow with, and I don’t know if necessarily retired, but I definitely wasn’t planning on leaving anytime soon.

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And really,

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by about October of 2020, within a week, girlfriend and I broke up, went through a few different rounds of layoffs at at my job, and I got caught up in the third one.

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And just kind of sitting there

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one day sitting at my kitchen table wondering what’s next, right? And

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I don’t know what happened. But in the last couple of years, something kind of clicked that day, right? I kind of got into this mode where I was just like, well look, you know, if

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you want to play the game, you know, this comes with it, right? You got to be on the field, and you got to take your head.

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And so if you’re gonna play this game called life, it’s not always going to be easy. And this is just a part of it, right?

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And something clicked and

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you know, I looked at that, and I said, that can be mad at the world that could be mad at my girlfriend.

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I could be mad at everything, you know, the situation and I didn’t cause this pandemic, girlfriend I broke up,

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she has some mental health issues that went unchecked. And

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those became

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substance abuse issues eventually, and those went unchecked. And then just one day, she’s just kind of up and left, right. And

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two things huge that I thought to find my life and out of my hands completely out of my control, they’re gone. And I said, you know, I can be mad at the world and you know, wrap myself under the blankets under my table and blame everybody else for why is this happening to me or I can kind of look at myself and you’re at about 400 pounds at the time.

Unknown Speaker 3:25
And of just paddling through life waiting water, right? Being okay with everything that came my way and say no, you know, I can I can take command I can take control, I could focus on me. And, and go out there and get it and it’s been the biggest change in my life. Starting with mindset, and then, you know, the, the physical stuff I’ve done to lose the weight but

Unknown Speaker 3:46
but yeah, it’s just been the biggest journey and the most rewarding journey of my life. And it’s opened up a lot of interesting and new opportunities like this one, the ability to to be a bit of a public speaker on on podcasts and webinars and different kinds of events and connect with people through social media who are going through similar journeys.

Unknown Speaker 4:07
And, you know, be kind of a sounding board and, and connecting how you’re having real authentic conversations with people on social media, which is something I didn’t think would ever happen right without a surprise to me, but as a byproduct and it’s been one of the most rewarding things in my life beyond just really the weight loss.

Unknown Speaker 4:27
I certainly appreciate you sharing all that. How much weight have have Have you lost Alex

Unknown Speaker 4:34
Yes, I’m sitting at about 130 pounds down right now.

Unknown Speaker 4:39
How does that feel?

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It’s nuts. It is absolutely crazy. So I I did it when I hit 100 I didn’t notice it at all.

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And even now like you know I’m still a big dude right? And I still kind of you know, you look in the mirror you

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analyze, okay, I got some more room to go.

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But the first time I kind of noticed it was I put on like an old shirt I can fit in more to fit.

Unknown Speaker 5:12
And I was like, whoa, okay, and I remember I kind of I tell everybody I went shopping in my, in my, in my drawers right like shopping in my, my chest of drawers for all my old clothes, and started just throwing on clothing and like, oh, this fit. So that fits like, this was better than it did when I bought it two years ago, right.

Unknown Speaker 5:31
So that was the first time I kind of noticed it. And that felt like a win.

Unknown Speaker 5:35
The biggest thing that I did notice wasn’t really appearance

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was my breathing. I used to sit on the Zoom calls, I hate it because you’d hear the recording, and you could just hear me huffing and puffing while I was sitting down. And, you know,

Unknown Speaker 5:54
that was crazy. And that’s kind of gone away by now. Right. And that’s and I can actually breathe, and I can actually, you know, walk them out without using my breath and that kind of stuff. And that’s the

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that’s the first the first thing like one of the first big things I noticed and kind of continue to notice. And that feels great. You know, there’s no hiding, there’s the that really

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was and continues to be a badge of honor every time I kind of like reach new physical level that I haven’t been able to before. Or in a very long time.

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That it just feels great. And it really is a great motivation.

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And that’s had some side effects, right? It’s that side effects with my career.

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Where this renewed energy, this renewed fire, this confidence that comes from it. This I can do and I can achieve. And I took on this thing that I thought was not possible. And and I’m making strides against it really motivated me in my career and made me double down in my career. And I’ve had some

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some real good career success and kind of the new mindset that went with it

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really made me focus on being intentional in everything I do.

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My personal life, but also my career. And that’s that’s helped me advance and grow in my career too. And

Unknown Speaker 7:12
so you don’t, at least I didn’t notice the changes bit by bit. But when I look back at occasions like this the last couple years. Yeah, it puts a smile on my face without any ego or anything, just like okay, cool. Like, I guess I can do it. And I guess I’m doing well. And

Unknown Speaker 7:29
it’s a good feeling to feel like

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to feel in control and feel like you’re actually taking part of your life. Yeah, amen. I think it’s awesome.

Unknown Speaker 7:42
You said he thought it was you thought it wasn’t possible.

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And I’m fascinated by what it is that that that motivates us, as myself included to to break free of negative patterns. So did you think that you couldn’t be the thought you think you were always going to be the weight that you were? Do you think you couldn’t lose weight?

Unknown Speaker 8:06
Yeah, I mean, like, a lot of people who go through this journey, many times I lost weight, considerable amount of weight, never this much, but you know, 3040 50 pounds, only to put all have it more back on.

Unknown Speaker 8:22
You know, I think I’d really just gotten to a point where I’ve given up on life, and I just okay, this is who I am, and this is what I am.

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And,

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you know, you get all the nobody sees a 400 pound guy and

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doesn’t have advice for them and doesn’t have judgment for them. Right. And I was just under 400 like 390 I think.

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And so

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that also was was its own thing besides like my own self limiting beliefs that I’ve put in kind of boxed myself with, there’s always this other thing where everyone else is telling you what to do and pointing fingers. And even doctors, right? You go to a doctor’s office and they’d be like, you’re gonna die at 40. Matter of fact, that’s it.

Unknown Speaker 9:13
So I really so there’s this other part of it where it wasn’t just that I had kind of given up. But when I would fight I fight those outside influences. Oh, you don’t like the more 400 pound guy go look away. Don’t look at me, then. Oh, Doctor, you think I’m going to die? Great. What’s your job and isn’t your job to keep me alive? Like, if you think I have a problem. Help me fix it. Right? Like actually helped me don’t just sit me here and tell me I’m going to die. I need to go do something. Right.

Unknown Speaker 9:40
And so

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part of it was, you know, I didn’t think it was possible because I had honestly just given up and said okay, this is who I am and this is what I’m going to be

Unknown Speaker 9:51
and when people would say something, even if it came from a good place or from a place of caring or from a place of

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of trying to motivate or just in the case of like the doctor scenario saying, Hey, you have a problem, and you need to think about this, like, wake up and think about this, I will just get mad. And so you don’t like how I look, you don’t like this thing about me, then then you know, goes off. And that’s where my energy was. So it created a circle of just not doing anything. And

Unknown Speaker 10:23
and yeah, it just became this. This sparks a limitation that I really put on myself. And, and I guess not for certain certain. Certainly he was kind of happy to live in. Right. And not unhappy. Not happy but content to live in. Right.

Unknown Speaker 10:39
That makes a lot of sense, man. Just, yeah.

Unknown Speaker 10:45
So what what new learnings if, if any, were Did Did did you need?

Unknown Speaker 10:54
Yeah, the biggest thing that that happened was

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just kind of sitting there and this idea that

Unknown Speaker 11:03
life doesn’t just happen to you, you take part in it. Right. And that was something that just clicked it just kind of

Unknown Speaker 11:13
I don’t know, after taking enough, you know, I guess punches to the face.

Unknown Speaker 11:20
And big ones at that time. I just did okay, I’m not going to, I’m not going to beat that person.

Unknown Speaker 11:28
And that was the biggest thing. Like everyone asks, How do you lose the weight? Right? And or did you die? Did you exercise? What diet did you do? And always asking you want another real story? Or do you want to know, you want to just tell you? Yeah, stop eating as much. And I run that, right? And the real story was that what did you learn? Right? It was this click on mindset. That just kind of happened. But

Unknown Speaker 11:51
I started going after challenges, I started looking at life

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in this way of like, okay, you haven’t achieved it till now. But that doesn’t mean you can’t achieve it. Right? And then every little thing that would happen, every little kind of baby step, every little window would happen.

Unknown Speaker 12:08
You know, as a win in the piggy bank, and I would look at it and say, okay, you know, I went hiking today, I used to never hike.

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I used to hate hiking, and I couldn’t hiking. I couldn’t get to the top of that hill, right. But I went hiking today, I made it to the top of that hill. And I’m huffing and puffing and it hurt. But I made it to the top of this hill so I can hike. I might still not like it, but I can hike and it was like little lessons like that. Along the way, as I started to get

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kind of more into this

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winning mindset or

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mindset that wasn’t focused on limitation, but on on trying it on doing. I did start looking at resources. You know, like I read David Goggins, I started listening to him on podcast and he kind of spoke to me in the old football player and me with his kind of like, you know, that that killer mentality, he has that take no prisoners, no excuses.

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extreme extreme accountability. mentality and started,

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you know, like, following Jordan Peterson on on Instagram, or the accounts attributed to him. And with those types of things.

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There was

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I guess, learning by way of influence, right, because there’s a lot of these people who just guys that a lot of them are talking about how to break down those self limiting beliefs, and how to start looking at, you know, pennies in the piggy bank for change, right, no matter what it is. financial goals, career goals, personal goals, weight loss, goals, relationships. All right.

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And so I,

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I continued learning by

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just going after, and kind of absorbing information in every format, and every place I could find, that spoke to that philosophy of extreme accountability, and change and progress, right?

Unknown Speaker 14:04
Instead of, you know, the bubble that I’ve created for myself prior of just the self limiting belief, right? So it wasn’t like, I didn’t take a class, you know, I didn’t do something like that.

Unknown Speaker 14:16
You know, but I just started to,

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to engage with more supportive content, and material and higher mindset material and that just kind of created this flow of, Okay, finish that What else can I believe who is going to go read? Who are these guys reading quarter they talking about in their books and their podcasts? And I just started to kind of absorb more and more and more and it just, it creates this

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ecosystem of positivity and, and,

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and achievement, right.

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And that kind of built the attitude.

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I love it.

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David Goggins and Jordan Peterson are really important human beings and I’m good

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for them every day, so

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what’s what’s what’s? What’s next?

Unknown Speaker 15:08
Yeah.

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Yeah, I think, for me the journeys not done. One of the things that this really opened up was once I started really losing weight, I started looking for other challenges, right, I started looking for

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what else do I not do?

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That I can do? What else have I said, I can’t do that I should go try, right? How else can I get out of my comfort zone and, and bring on experience? And then what other goals do I have?

Unknown Speaker 15:37
So from a goal perspective, once I started achieving

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my, you know, my weight loss goals and making changes there, I started looking at my finances, right? I want to own a house one day, I want to, you know, make this kind of money, I want to have this amount in my savings, right? am I saving right now? No. Okay, if you want to have X amount, you want to have a million dollars in savings account one day, you should probably start saving. Realistically, you should probably start investing. So you know, one of the funniest things I did was a couple years ago, I returned

Unknown Speaker 16:10
my car lease, and I had money to go buy a car. And if it weren’t the pandemic, I don’t need a car, I work from home, and I live in a walkable neighborhood. So I gave my car back and I never bought my car, I took all that money I save for a car. And and when I put in investments,

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funny thing in the last couple of years, the used car market is up like 75%. And my investments are probably down like 75%. So the first time in recorded history, buying a used car was a better financial decision.

Unknown Speaker 16:39
But, but no, I started looking at things like that in a different way. Like, okay, what are these other things you want to do? Right? I started looking at my career and talking to my leadership and saying, hey, you know, I’m here. But this is where I want to be, how do we get there? And I started work talking to my subordinates, and saying, Hey, you’re here, but where do you want to go? And how do I help you get there? Right.

Unknown Speaker 17:03
And then another thing that I did was that was kind of fun is that I put out a post on Instagram and I was kind of like Alright, everybody tells me your ideal of health. Like what is the physical challenge that you do that are like the exercise class you take that like just makes you cry? Like you’re sitting in there wondering your question your life choices. And people came back Oh, takes berries. Oh, take Orangetheory Oh, take this class. Oh, you should go run a you should go run a race. Right. So I started running five K’s I started taking these crazy workout classes. Right and he didn’t run spin he did room, aerobics go in, you come out and you’re just It looks like you jumped in the ocean and came out right?

Unknown Speaker 17:47
Ran a Spartan Race in July and have a have another one coming up December 10. And have committed with one of my friends to do a 10k and a trail and all these other crazy ones next year, or we’re about to buy four or five races for next year.

Unknown Speaker 18:04
And so that’s what’s next right just be continued challenge and trying to look at others limitations that put myself in other boxes that put myself in.

Unknown Speaker 18:15
And other goals I have around those and saying, Okay, how can I how can I address those? How can I get where I want professionally? Right? How can I get where I want financially? What do I have to do to get there, right? And then even simpler things, right? Like I think

Unknown Speaker 18:31
it’s our duty to be educated and to be an educated population, right? And I think smart people read X RP people read, but I don’t read, right. So I started picking up books, and I realized I wasn’t getting through books I started with Okay, well, the last time I picked up a book, they didn’t have audible around. But I can go pick up audible, right. And listen there. And I listened to two or three books a month on Audible. And I tried to read one.

Unknown Speaker 18:58
listen to podcasts like yours.

Unknown Speaker 19:00
I listened to a whole bunch of them love them.

Unknown Speaker 19:04
And just looking at, okay, how can I take this individual progress I’ve had on weight loss, and expand it and use that mindset to attack growth in education and learning and progress on multiple fronts. And how do I do that at the same time, right.

Unknown Speaker 19:22
And so it’s just, I’m trying to just my goal is to level up as a human, I do have a weight loss goal I want to

Unknown Speaker 19:30
I don’t have any numbers necessary that I look at. I have a picture of me in high school from when I was playing football and about 185 pounds at that point in time. And I don’t necessarily hit 185 But I’m like I’d like to look like that again. I’d like to fit in that that shirt again.

Unknown Speaker 19:47
And I have that shirt and it’s in my closet right like the last 25 years.

Unknown Speaker 19:54
But when you say what’s next it’s you know, I think my goal is to

Unknown Speaker 20:00
should really just kind of level up

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just as a human right to just kind of

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keep being the best version of me. And through these connections, like with the podcast, and the people who reach out on Instagram and through social media,

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helping inspire and influence people and letting them know you can do it too, right? It’s not, I’m not a magician, I’m not doing anything crazy, right? I just decided to get up and do it one day.

Unknown Speaker 20:31
I just decided that I was going to quit

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recruiting attitude. Right, the last thing I was going to quit on was quitting.

Unknown Speaker 20:40
And so I really, you know, it sounds kind of corny, but but I want to spread joy and happiness and positivity with my time on this planet, right and, and help people realize their boxes, the boxes they put around themselves, and that that’s not real. That’s just a figment of your imagination. And all it takes is one decision one day to make those changes you’re looking for.

Unknown Speaker 21:04
So kind of a broader answer on what’s next. But that’s kind of what I want to continue to do and where I, where I hope to see this go. I love it.

Unknown Speaker 21:12
spread joy, positivity and happiness and it only takes one decision. think that that is true words have never been spoken. Well, Alex, thank you so much for coming on and sharing your story. Where can people learn more about you? How can we track your progress?

Unknown Speaker 21:28
Yeah, the best way is on Instagram, the handle is at fat kid. Beautiful.

Unknown Speaker 21:35
That’s the best way I’m on all social media with that name, but Instagram is where I am most active and regularly active.

Unknown Speaker 21:44
And then you can also just find me kind of more one to one. You can find me on LinkedIn. Just my name Alex. Ed. Excellent. What’s the handle again? Did you say fat kid beautiful.

Unknown Speaker 21:56
Yes. Beautiful. All right. Love it. If you enjoyed as much as I did, so Alex, your appreciation and share today’s show with a friend who also appreciates good ideas follow Alex on Instagram. His handle is at fat kid beautiful. I’ll link that in the notes as well as all the other places on the interwebs that we can track him down. Thanks again, Alex.

Unknown Speaker 22:18
Thank you. And until next time, remember, just like Alex been talking about? Do your part by doing your best

Transcribed by https://otter.ai